Is Imitation really flattering?

Yesterday on the news they were talking about the Superbowl commercials that would air this weekend.   The newest Volkswagen ad is causing a bit of controversy.   Apparently,  the ad has a white male in a business office setting talking in a Jamaican accent.   There is some discussion about whether or not the ad is racist.    NBC did an on-line poll and the overwhelming response was "no", it was not racist.    But, it was pointed out that all the people in the commercial/office were white, and a few people did point out this fact.

We have had discussions in our house about whether imitating accents is racist or not.   I think we all agree that there are certain instances when someone is intentionally doing it to mock others, and that is never okay.    But, what about when it is done just for fun?

No one blinks an eye when someone imitates a British accent, at least in the United States, it might be a different case in other places in the world.   So, why is it not okay to imitate an Indian, Chinese, or Jamaican accent?   If the Superbowl commercial had a guy walking around talking in a British accent, would anyone even comment?   And, the follow up question, in that case, would anyone notice that there were no black people in the commercial?

One of my daughter's loves to walk around the house imitating all sorts of accents.   Yet, she is the first one to condemn others for doing the same in school.   For the most part, there is a distinction.   She is imitating almost as a form of flattery.  She likes the way certain accents sound.   Others do it, particularly at school, to poke fun at certain ethnic groups.  But, do her good intentions make her behavior okay, while it's not okay for others?

And, is there a difference between imitating, say, a British accent, and imitating one associated with a certain ethnicity?

Any thoughts?  Discuss.

Forever Tainted

I remember as a child someone once explained the breeding of pure-bred dogs to me.
I was told that if a pure-bred dog gave birth to a litter of mutts, she could never give birth to a litter of pure-bred pups again.  Somehow, this bitch had made herself "dirty".    I can still remember pondering this as a child.  I had some knowledge of the birds and the bees, but it was still incomplete.   I actually thought that every time two dogs bred that some part of the male was forever left in the female, and that piece would somehow be a part of every future litter.

As a teenager, I had a epiphany while sitting in health class one day that this information that I had held in my head for so long was total BS.   If a poodle and a schnauzer mated they would have adorable schnoodle pups.  But, that poodle could absolutely have pure-bred poodles again.    They just wouldn't be recognized as such by the AKC because, as I said before, the bitch was dirty.   What foolishness!   I was so happy to be enlightened!

When I married an Asian man it was not lost on me that I would give birth to mutts one day.  In fact, I loved the idea.   My best friend from childhood will tell you that I always had a fondness for Asian babies and the way their jet black hair would stick straight up.    When I was pregnant with my first child, I confided in her that I didn't care if it was a boy or a girl but I really wanted the baby to have "Asian baby hair".   And wow! did my wish come true!  DD1 was born with a thick mop of hair and for the first few months of her life we affectionately called her "Don King" because it grew up so straight.    

DD1 at 2 months

Don King

For what it's worth, DD2 was born with the same delightful shock of black hair.

When both my kids were still really young I was at the park with a friend one day.   She was in a philosophical mood and asked me, "Isn't it strange to think that if something happened to your DH, and you married a different guy, a blond guy, that you could have children that looked completely different than DD1 and DD2?"   This question completely stumped me.   And, the answer was that no, I could never imagine having and loving children that looked different than the ones I already had.  

Now, I'm sure this is true for all mothers whether their children are half-Asian, red-headed, tow-headed or purple with green dots.   You love your children, and it is impossible to imagine loving "other" children that don't even exist, especially ones that look radically different than the ones you already have.   I get this.  

But, it also makes me think back to the dogs, the pure breds and the mutts.   A dog that had a litter with another breed was forever "tainted".    I finally understand the inherent truth here.    It's not something you ever get rid of.   It's the secret of the dirty bitch.

Dear Smart Non-Asian Kid (SNAK),

Dear Smart Non-Asian Kid (SNAK) in DD2's math class,

I don't know much about you.   I am assuming you are smart because my daughter told me that you received a 100% on your recent algebra test.  I am also guessing you are not Asian, because of what I have heard about you.  So, if you don't mind I will just call you SNAK.

SNAK, I think you should be really proud of yourself for getting a 100% on that test.  From what I hear, it was not an easy test, so getting a perfect score was quite a feat.   As you know, my daughter received a 95% on that test.    She studied and worked really hard to get that grade.   She did not, however, appreciate it when you bragged to some classmates that you "did better than the Asian kid".

SNAK, I'm guessing you are a kid who has some potential so I want to tell you something.   Being Asian doesn't mean you are automatically smart.  No one, of any race, is born understanding algebra.  Now, I will concede that it comes easier to some than others, but everyone has to take the time to learn it.    When you said, that you "did better than the Asian kid", you did a disservice to both yourself and my daughter.    I am guessing that you were driven to do well on that test.   I am guessing that you studied hard, put down the video controller, and figured out all your x's and y's.   You didn't do well on that test because of your ethnicity, and neither did she.     She is a kid with goals, and doing her homework is important to her, she has places she wants to go in this world, and she works hard to achieve her goals.   I'm guessing you do too.   So, let's stop the racial remarks, it's demeaning to you both.

So SNAK, next time you do better than my daughter on a math test (like that is going to ever happen now that you have gotten her ire up), try saying, "Wow!  I did better than DD2 and she works really hard."   or even better, try saying, "Wow!  I got a 100% on my math test!  I studied so hard for this test!  That is freaking awesome!  I am freaking awesome!"

SNAK, what I am trying to say is that I have faith in you.  Let's bring it up a notch.  Okay?

Thank you.