Accept the Gift

The holidays are upon us again and that is always an extremely difficult time for acceptance, religious and personal.   Here are some of my thoughts on how to deal with some of the most "stressful" holiday dilemmas:

"Can I say "Merry Christmas!"?"
The truth is that I think most people are not adverse to good cheer.   But, there is a distinct difference between "Merry Christmas!" and "Merry Christmas dammit!"   You know what I mean.   We all know the difference between pure holiday exuberance and shoving one's ideologies down another's throat.  It's hard to begrudge the former, but the latter, well...........

"Can I send my non-Christian friends Christmas cards?"  
There are people who love holiday cards, and people who hate them.   It has little to do with religion.   I bet that if you write a personal note inside your card to a non-Christian friend that says something like, "I really miss you and I think of you every December, I remember when we were in college, and we were stuck at the Detroit airport during a snowstorm, and we went to a bar in another terminal with that cute guy from Houston and almost missed our flight...hahaha..." you might bring a smile to an old friend's face, and the Cross on the front of your card?   It's not gonna matter so much.

"Every year my sweet elderly neighbor brings me a fruitcake at Christmas time.  I hate fruitcake.  Should I tell her this?"
No.

"Can I buy my non-Christian friend a Christmas present?"   
Of course!  But, I would not recommend a nativity scene or a Santa sweater.  Remember that recent conversation you had with her on the phone?  The one where she mentioned her son had accidentally broke her ceramic sugar bowl, and how sad she was?  Need I say more?

"My friend says she is allergic to chocolate, but I don't believe her, should I buy her a box of chocolates for Christmas and show her that I know she is lying?"
No.

"Can I go to a friend's house and be part of a religious celebration that it not my own?"
Your friend invited you to their house to join in the celebration of one of their most sacred days?  Wow.   She must think a lot of you to include you in this, you are a valued and trusted friend.   They must believe that you are a person who respects other's traditions, and doesn't mock the beliefs of others.  This is the highest compliment.  Go.

"My sister hates the color green, but I just love it.  I saw this beautiful green sweater.   I think she would like it as much as I do.  Should I get it for her?"
No.

It's not really about religion.   It's about acceptance of the people in your life.   It's about accepting different beliefs, values, and personal preferences.

It's also about accepting fruitcake.